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Summary из главы Why kids lie (подчеркну, что в книге все понятнее и интереснее)  

Why Kids Lie

• In controlled laboratory tests, people cannot tell when children are lying
  • Police officers often score worse than chance (45%)
  • The only people who score better are teachers (60%)
• The same tests reveal consistent biases
  • People believe that girls tell the truth more often, when they lie as often as boys
  • They believe introverts are less trustworthy, even though introverts are less likely to lie (because they lack the social skills to pull it off)
• In another experiment, children were presented with an opportunity to cheat to win a game
  • 33% of 3-year-olds cheated, and when asked if they cheated, most admitted it
  • 80% of 4-year-olds cheated, and 80% denied cheating when asked
  • Children with older siblings seem to learn how to lie earlier
• The children who are best at knowing the difference between truth and lies are the most likely to lie
• In home observation studies, 4-year-olds will lie every 2 hours, 6-year-olds will like once an hour. 96% of children observed lied during the observation period.
• Most lies to parents are part of a cover-up, and parents see through them, but less than 1% of the parents punished the cover-up.  So children learn that lying doesn't have a cost.
• Children and adults view lying differently
  • Children are more disapproving--they are more likely to think that a liar is a bad person, and that lying is morally wrong
  • Children don't consider intent. Any false statement--regardless of intent or belief--is a lie.
    • E.g. Dad promises son he'll take him to the baseball game on Saturday. When they get home, Mom reminds them that he has a swim lesson that afternoon, so he can't go.  A child will consider the Dad a liar, and when he is not punished for it, concludes that lying is okay.
• Kids associate lying with punishment
  • 38% of 5-year-olds think that profanity is a lie
  • Researchers found that kids who are threatened with punishment for lying become better liars at an earlier age, and learn to get caught less often
• Lying is a sign of intelligence--it takes skill to lie
  • Children who are better liars do better on other tests of academic prowess
• If a researcher makes the child promise to tell the truth, lying declines 25%
• Hearing the story about George Washington and the cherry tree (суть истории в том, что маленького Вашингтона отец похвалил за то, что мальчик признался в своей лжи) cut down lying 50% in girls and 75% in boys
• Meanwhile, hearing "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" actually increased lying
• The key is that George Washington receives immunity from punishment AND is praised for telling the truth
  • Parents need to teach kids the value of honesty; kids already know lying is wrong, so reinforcing that message doesn't work.
• Parents encourage lying in the name of politeness
  • When researchers presented kids with a bar of soap as a reward for test performance, parents approved of their kids lying to be polite (presumably instead of saying, "Soap? WTF?")
  • Children learn that honest creates conflict, and that dishonesty is an easy way to avoid conflict
• Tattling (ябедничество)
  
  • 90% of the time, the tattler is telling the truth
  • Children only tattle 7% of the time when they're wronged
  • Yet Parents are 10X as likely to chastise a child for tattling as they are for lying.